Why Parents Talk About Poop

Have you ever thought to yourself and yet another status message about her kid's bowel movements? Why is it it that parents feel the need to always share the smelly details of their day?

The daily encounters of parents, in particular the ones staying home with the kids, are so traumatic and disgusting that if they didn't seek out empathy and humor, they would undoubtedly sink into a pit of disgust and self-loathing at the state of their shoulders and the foul atrocities nasally witnessed each day.

For instance, last night I inadvertently allowed son 1 to stay in a pull-up about 10 hours too long. Mind you, he is potty trained while awake, but I simply forgot to change him out of the nap pull-up and into the night time one at bed time, so he started off one sheet and mattress pad to the wind. So as I am changing his bedding for his nap today, he is on the potty and I hear the word poop uttered several times before hearing shrieks of laughter and AWWW, Matthew! Son 2 was fishing for carp (rearrange letters at will) with his hand shoved down in the water between son 1's legs, while son 1 had sczootched to the back of the seat cackling. Thank the Lord for dial soap.

For every five shared status messages or stories shared by a parent, you can assume there is at least one unspeakable story of which you will never know. Be thankful you don't hear those stories. Be thankful if you have those stories that your toddler will forget them.

Parents need to know that what goes on inside their walls doesn't only go on inside their walls. They need the badge of bravery that comes from shared laughter and groans of ewwww. Some days I feel like it is me versus the crazies, and I can't help but sigh you boys are sooo gross! They are, but I don't love them any less for it.

Thursday Thoughts

Is it really Thursday already? Do you know what is all over my deck? Bird poop. That's right, my need to see the birds up close has usurped my desire for a sanitary deck. The front row seat makes the cat twitchy, who has nearly gone ferrel after subsequent days of sneaking outside and having a camp out during that nasty night of frost this week. She usually sticks to the floor and couches, but I've caught her drinking out of frying pans in the sink and licking a plate of leftover pizza. She's seven years old and rediscovering her youth, a midlife crisis of sorts.

This morning I've been reflecting on some things I'm thankful for. I'm thankful for my crazy cat who restrains herself from scratching my crazy boys faces as they attempt to give her their oftentimes aggressive love. I'm thankful for friends that I can be real with and who pass on quotes that make them think of me. I'm thankful for a church that loves Jesus and whose messiness isn't brushed under the rug. I'm thankful for all this rain that's making the green shoot up from the ground and out the brown tips of branches. I'm thankful for this silly little blog that gives me an outlet for writing and venting and exploring. I'm thankful for you who read my silly blog and occasionally send me notes to encourage or challenge me. I'm thankful for my son who is cracking me up right now as he freaks out over not being able to stand on his head.

Stuck in the Mud

As an undergrad I stood beneath a stream embankment wearing waders up to my bottom and holding a survey rod. I took a couple small sinking steps and realized that I could no longer move. The mud was sticky and deep enough that I couldn't lift my leg high enough to take a step. Even if I tried to take a step, I'd lose balance and fall on my face, with my feet still stuck in the same two muddy holes. I could possibly pull my feet out of the waders, but then I'd be wet and stuck with no shoes on. Anything I could attempt on my own, no matter how brave and noble was destined to end in a total mess. Once we got the elevation shot with the Topcon, my boss came over to the side of the bank and lifted me straight up and out by my hands, boots and all.

I don't enjoy hearing how messed up my heart is apart from Jesus, but have you ever been in that place where you just feel it? No one has to point it out to you. It's like trying to walk through that swampy water. No one needs to tell you that you are standing in a swamp because your feet can't move. Maybe you decide to take on a new ministry opportunity and you get that rush and fuzzy feeling that comes with collaborating with others and improving the lives of other people, but when it's just you and God in that dark quite space before you fall asleep, you realize you're not any closer to him than before you started.

Content. While my natural inclination is to fixate on the appearance and the action, it is the content that matters. Of what, you ask? My heart. Of your heart. I wonder if there has ever been a single thing I've done that hasn't been tainted by the pursuit of self-(anything). Motherhood is the closest thing to unselfish love I've ever come to, but even that is mixed with feelings of duty, fears of failure, and saving face. My time in Romania was overshadowed by the huge amount of pride I got from being there and from doing something "good" for the orphanage.

Let this verse out of Mark 10 rattle around in your heart a bit: "'Why do you call me good?' Jesus answered. "No one is good--except God alone."

What is the content of my heart? What is it I aspire to? Is it to be good? Substituting one word from Jesus's statement above - Is it to be God? Whew, all of the sudden I'm on par with a certain fallen angel. Any aspirations of being something fall short of desiring Christ himself. Desiring goodness, love, patience do not get me Jesus. Having Jesus brings those things, but I don't have Jesus so that I can have those things. Either He is singular and worthy of it all, or I am wasting my time.

This is where my own train continually derails. There is always something in it for me. I always want the affirmation and the praise. I want to look like I have my junk together. I want to sound wise. But rarely do I truly, honestly just want Jesus. Yes, I feel like a terrible jerk for even typing it. I'm in the mud up to my knees and I can't wiggle out. This is where I am. I'm looking up at the bank and done pretending like there's something I can do to make my situation any better.

Here's the appearance of my life: I am thankful. Circumstantially, life is awesome. But here's the content: there is a longing and a need for the personal embrace of Jesus that has been brushed aside so long that the static nature of my heart as deluded me into thinking that status quo is acceptable - that joy over the blessings can be a substitute for the joy of the Blesser, that I can keep being the spiritually train-wrecked friend so long as I am vulnerable and funny about it, that just because no one is calling my bluff that they don't see it.

10 Weeks of Vegetable Gardening: Week 9

Each Friday I am posting a weekly guide for prepping your home vegetable garden. In Raleigh, the last killing frost date is April 11 (on average, give or take a week), so my first weekend for planting (summer crops) outdoors is April 9.

If you just couldn't resist planting some of your sprouts before the last frost date, you might be a little nervous about the frost warnings for this weekend. I couldn't help planting a couple tomatoes and squash early but saved most for planting later. Still, those seedlings are an investment of time and money, so I want to protect them.

Here are a several tips for protecting those plants that are susceptible to frost damage:

1) Make tents out of a vertical stakes and a pillow case, blanket, newspaper, or tarp. This will help trap the heat and keep it from escaping at night. It is best to do this early in the evening before they have begun to lose a lot of heat.

2) Cut soda bottles or milk jugs in half and place over the plants. This will create a mini green house around each plant.

3) Water the ground well before nightfall. The wet ground loses heat more slowly and can insulate the plants.

4) Bring potted plants inside as the roots have less ground to insulate them from the cold.

5) Mulch the garden. Mulch will not only hold in the moisture, but it will also hold in the heat. You will still want to protect the leaves, so pair this with the tents or bottles.

Full Moon

Joe and I peeked outside last night at what was to be the closest full moon in almost 20 years. Nothing weird happened. What a relief.

10 Weeks of Vegetable Gardening: Week 8

Each Friday I am posting a weekly guide for prepping your home vegetable garden. In Raleigh, the last killing frost date is April 11 (on average, give or take a week), so my first weekend for planting (summer crops) outdoors is April 9

Have you given thought to what you will be going your tomatoes and bean vines on yet? This is a great time to look back over your layout plans (or to start thinking through them) and determine what type of support system you will use for plants that like to be trellised.

I have used bamboo teepees for peas, green beans and tomatoes the past couple years. They are easy to build and the materials are fairly inexpensive, especially when you can buy them in bulk. I was able to find packs of 12 at Big Lots several years ago.

These metal trellises ran about $30 each, but I found them on sale at Lowes. I used them to grow Carolina Jessamine in the past, but we dug that out for the new garden. I plan on growing hanging squash from these.

I purchased this old ladder at the flea market a couple weekends ago. It would make a nice support for tomato bushes and only cost me $10, whereas some of the sturdier cages can cost upwards of $15. A ladder can add a little whimsey to the garden. Unfortunately, Daniel has already claimed this one as his own. A teepee out of bamboo or large sticks can make a wonderful trellis as well.

These 10 ft metal thingermabobs (technically they are steel remesh) were located in the masonry aisle of Lowes and cost me $2.97 a piece. I purchased seven of them to make a pole bean tunnel.

Start looking and dreaming!

I couldn't keep looking at the ants. Here are some pretty birds.

Wordless Wednesday: They're Baaaack

I could seriously use some advice on getting these out of the veggie garden and away from the kid's teepee. Daniel reacts pretty strongly to their bites. I've used a garden safe poison (yeah, like I really believe it either) because I need to get them OUT now.

10 Weeks of Vegetable Gardening: Week 7

Each Friday I am posting a weekly guide for prepping your home vegetable garden. In Raleigh, the last killing frost date is April 11 (on average, give or take a week), so my first weekend for planting (summer crops) outdoors is April 9


We impulsively go to Lowes on the weekends. We just can't hold ourselves back. Even Daniel requests it, always hoping for a turn on the riding mowers. This week I found myself stopping at Walmart, Burkes Brothers, and Logan's. That's right, THREE places. I picked up some lovely saxifraga (pink-flowered evergreen ground cover), sweet mint, lemon thyme, and some Italian climbing summer squash seeds. What caught me off guard was that some stores were selling tomato plants, and it is still several weeks before the last killing frost.

Two summers ago, I started planting outdoors fairly early, several weeks before my neighbors. You'd better believe I was checking the forecast. Once, I had every bed linen that wasn't on our bed covering veggie plants at night. I made a tarp tent for my peas. Silly me, I didn't know that peas don't need tents and peppers really shouldn't be planted that early (which probably explains the pillar of peppers failure).

From what I've read, there are plants such as tomatoes that may be planted early (although protected from frost). As the temperature drops, they may start to droop, but fruit production won't be impacted later in the summer. Other plants such as peppers, may look completely unaffected by the cold but produce very disappointing peppers later. Peas, broccoli, lettuces are fairly hardy and can handle a little frost in the early spring.

So if you are very eager to plant a tomato bush, go for it, but don't blame me if we get a late spring blizzard. All my sprouts are staying warm in the hot box still. I did accidentally leave it open one night and lost two cucumber sprouts, but I'm crossing my fingers that everything else is okay.

By the way, I counted and I recounted my weeks, and I still had it off on the planting date and counting back 10 weeks. So if you feel behind, don't worry. My neighbor always plants on Good Friday. I'll probably be planting two weeks before on the 9th.

10 Weeks of Vegetable Gardening: Week 6

Each Friday I am posting a weekly guide for prepping your home vegetable garden. In Raleigh, the last killing frost date is April 11 (on average, give or take a week), so my first weekend for planting (summer crops) outdoors is April 9.


Can you believe it is only 4 weeks left until the last killing frost? I am absolutely delighted to see redbuds blossoming, although I know my sinuses will soon be barraged by pollen. This week I have been sowing flower seeds everywhere - in the ground, indoors, and in my cold-frame. Most of my seed packets say March - May, so I dove right in. I originally wanted my garden to only house vegetables, until I considered that it would be nice to have perennial flowers and bulbs and herbs to serve as the bones and give structure and color to the garden.


There are some annuals that once you get going will keep coming back year after year. One of those is cockscomb, an edible plant eaten in West and Central Africa and East Asia. I harvested a bag of seeds from my neighbors' flowers last year, and they have already sprouted in my cold-frame. She says they usually come up late summer in her yard, so I will be getting a head-start.


This week I also put lettuce sprouts in the ground, which means that it is time to lay out the drip (or soaker) hoses, which save a lot of water as compared to a sprinkler. Believe me, you will only make the mistake of laying a drip hose AFTER you have planted your garden once. Drip hoses are not very expensive, but can break down over the years. Before installing it in the garden, check to make sure there are no clogs and that the water is fairly evenly distributed down the length of the hose. 


The following seeds can be planted indoors this week: cantaloupe, cucumber, okra, pumpkin, and squash.


Happy gardening!

Pause.

This is a rare moment the boys are napping together.




Hear that?




Neither do I.

It's nice.

Well, there's Matthew. Can't hold my breath too long! Check out these cuties though: